So as many of you may know, I have been reading this book called "When God Writes Your Love Story" by Eric and Leslee Ludy. I finished it a few weeks ago now (sorry I skipped a few weeks) and it was probably one of the best devotionals I have ever done. It brought up so many topics that, out of all the relationship materials and sermons I have participated in, I had never thought of in the way they were presented in the book. So, to get right to the point I am going to share just a few of the awesome things that stuck out to me.
Throughout the book one of the most basic things that they focused on was the fact that you should, no need, to have a strong relationship with God before you can have a strong relationship with another person. A strong, true relationship with Christ will fulfill you more than any human relationship ever could, and it has to. In other words, God needs to be enough; HE has to be the one that fulfills you, not another person. It would be unfair for that much pressure to be put on one person when it was a longing that only God was meant to fill. Also, you have to make sure that you are strong enough in your own faith before you can help another person in theirs. This isn't to say that you are going to have to carry along your spouse like a ball and chain in their walk, in fact it shouldn't be like that at all, but at times you will need each other to be accountability partners for your relationship with the Lord. That being said, the other person needs to be just as mature in his or her faith, as you are in yours. This leads into the next topic; what to look for in a husband or wife.
So, let me just start by saying that in my opinion, the whole idea of dating is to find the one I am going to marry. I'm not, nor have I ever been, the kind of girl that is going to date someone just for the heck of it or just to say I have a boyfriend. So really, it's considered courtship more than dating. Anyways, the whole idea of marriage is to find someone that will assist you in your walk with Christ. This is someone that you will be spending the rest of your life with and will have a very heavy influence on your life and your walk with God. Finding someone that shares the same beliefs as you is pertinent to having a successful marriage. Also, finding someone who will not hold you back from reaching a God-filled life also should be a requirement. If a person is holding you back from having a deeper relationship with your Savior or is not allowing you to be who you believe God wants you to be in Him, then that is a sure sign that your relationship may not one God has intended for you. Don't settle for what YOU think is the best, because believe me, the Creator of the universe has something incredible in store for you and does NOT want you to settle.
Now this next one is not something anyone really would read and be super exciting about doing. In fact, it is something that I think a good 99.9% of us have tried to completely avoid doing at all cost growing up but it really is a phenomenal idea. So here it is: INCLUDE YOUR PARENTS! Yup, I said it folks. Let them in on all the details and sincerely ask for their opinion. When the Ludy's first mentioned this a big red "not over my dead body" flag went off in my head. But then they said something that made me think. They talked about how parents, Godly or not, have all been put into our lives for a particular reason. They can teach us lessons and give us a good opinion. Above all, parents (or parental figures) are people who genuinely love us and want the very best for us in life. That is an extremely rare feeling for someone to have for you and mom and dad are the best at it. Because of this, it makes no sense at all to shut them out of one of the most important aspects of our life! Including mom and dad in the dating area of your life can be really helpful and keep you feeling disconnected and like you have to hind something from them. Hiding in a relationship never turns out well, so just try to let them in on what's going on!
My favorite topic within the book was one that I personally struggle with. Giving God the pen. Key word there being "give"; He won't fight you for it, it has to be your choice. You have to come to the realization that you ideas for your life my be completely different from God's. Not only that, but giving Him the pen also means being okay with the that.Whoever holds the pen is the author of your life and to be perfectly honest I try really hard to be that pen holder. I clasp onto it with all of my might instead of giving it up to the Creator, Himself, to write my love (or life) story. This isn't just for your relationship part of your life either; its for every part! Every time I start to fall into "selfish pen mode" I try to remind myself that I am TERRIBLE at writing. I mean really, if I am going to be completely honest with myself, I have to say I have been coming up with some of the worst ideas in all of history ever since I was a child. Ideas like wanting to be a veterinarian when I can't stand blood, jumping off the roof of a storage shed with an umbrella to see if it would make me float, trying to swim with my feet together like a mermaid tail causing me to sink, putting tin foil in the microwave or watermelon rinds down the garbage disposal (sorry dad). Stupid, absolutely stupid. So when I think about it, its really for my own good that I let God do the writing. Only He knows what all I would (and often do) mess up when the pen is in my hand! All I know, is He is the ultimate Author of every life, and especially love, story because He IS love. God is the creator and utter definition of love and has shown us every example of true love that we could ever need by dying on the cross and showing us grace everyday.
I don't know about you, but I really love fairytales. Disney is, of course, my favorite. Its wonderful and sets high expectations but is absolutely pathetic compared to anything King of Kings could ever write. God knows what is best for you and believe me when I say He has the most beautiful, enchanting fairytale planned out for you that is more wonderful than anything you could ever dream about. With all of that being said I challenge you to give God your pen and let God write you love story.
Until next time,
Gloria
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